Out What Now Podcast: What’s Holding You Back?



Out What Now Podcast Part 2:

A few weeks back on the Out What Now Podcast,  Megan and I talked a little about her journey as my client and the significant themes that often keep people stuck.

Megan also asked me what the major limiting beliefs that I have experienced on my journey were.

Here’s what I shared:

A common theme that I found on my inner journey and that of many of my LGBTQ2+ clients is this theme around subconsciously holding myself back because I rejected myself for being a lesbian when I was younger.

For example, the reason I went to see a coach years ago was because I was unhappy with my career.

On the outside, it looked like I was living a perfect life.

If you looked on the inside, though, I still felt like the life I had created wasn’t enough, and I was still searching for that missing piece but didn’t know what that was. I felt depleted, helpless, anxious, lost and frustrated within my career and thought I was wasting my life.

The truth is that the reason I was feeling stuck, lost and unfulfilled was because of subconscious beliefs and fears I had learned over time. Most of these blocks were actually tied to feeling unworthy of love from when I rejected myself when I was younger for being a lesbian.

It’s fascinating because there is NO WAY I would have been able to connect those dots consciously.

So what I found in my journey is that although I was happy being gay, subconsciously, I was still associating something ‘bad’  or ‘unsafe’ with it, and it was keeping me stuck.

The important thing to note here is that consciously I was confident with my sexuality.

At the time, I am happily married to my wife. I’m a founding board member for the first internal support network for LGBTQ2+ officers and allies. I had been featured in an LGBTQ documentary, I was hosting ‘Happy to be me’ workshops, etc. but subconsciously, there was still something keeping me stuck.

One way this showed up was when I went to take my business to the next level. I had tons of resistance around being ‘happy’ and ‘successful’ and sharing my message with the world. I felt like I was playing small, and I kept myself in the closet, so to speak in terms of fully living from my heart and being me.

This is important because “you won’t create what you want in life; you create what you believe.”

This is something that my mentor Lise Janelle taught me, and it stuck with me.

“You won’t create what you want in life. You create what you believe.”

And the truth is if you don’t believe that you’re worthy, because of (insert illusion here), then later in life, when you go to take your life, relationships, finances, career, etc. to the next level, subconsciously, you’ll hold yourself back.

Your conscious mind wants it, but subconsciously you are saying no, this isn’t safe, people aren’t going to like you anymore, you will be rejected, you aren’t worthy, etc.

The problem is most of the time; you have no idea what your beliefs are.

That is why having a tool and resources to help you release these limiting beliefs is game-changing and the key to success!

After seeing how much this has transformed my life and those around me, I have a huge desire to help others do the same.

I provide my clients with the tools and resources to help them identify and release the subconscious blocks that are keeping them stuck so that they can get out of their own way and live the life they are meant to.

For the full podcast, be sure to visit here

Out What Now Podcast: How to navigate challenges as you are ‘waking-up.



Last week, I enjoyed being a guest on the Out What Now Podcast hosted by Megan Pulvermacher.

Megan is by far one of the most authentic, funny and incredible people I know. She also happens to be one of my all-star clients. If you haven’t already, be sure to subscribe to her Out What Now Podcast. You will not be disappointed!

One of the things we chatted about on the podcast was this idea around ‘waking up’ and how when you are waking up, it doesn’t necessarily mean that life gets ‘easier’ (it gets better), but not necessarily ‘easier.’

As you start doing your inner work and becoming more conscious and aware of your life, it doesn’t mean that things are all of a sudden amazing and free of challenges.

There are still challenges; they just come in different forms.

For instance, a common challenge can be feeling like you are growing, but the people around you are not on the same wavelength as you—and you may feel like your environment is no longer supporting you.

The truth is, there will always be equal support and challenge, no matter where you are on your journey.

The cool thing about ‘waking up’ though is that although there are challenges, if you play the game right, they are more inspiring and more aligned with your heart desires instead of just uninspiring challenges that others throw your way.

In this “awake” phase, the key is to live from your heart.

When you live from your heart, nothing’s missing. This is the most fulfilling, inspiring place to be.

True success is living from your heart!

A great representation of real success is the Yin and Yang.

Yin, which is the female principle, means to listen. Your heart wants you to know two things.

  1. That you are worthy of love, loveable and loved
  2. To admit your dreams, goals, and aspirations.

Yang, which is a male principle, means acting.

Once you’ve admitted what you truly want, the key is to put it into action!

And you must do both!

Some people are good at listening, i.e. doing tons of personal development, reading etc. but are not putting it into action. And others are good at ‘doing’ and accomplishing, but often they don’t stop and listen, and one day they wake up and realize that their actions were unfulfilling.

You need both!

The truth is your heart is always speaking to you and has been this whole time; you likely just haven’t heard it because you’re not listening or you’re distracting yourself.

Remember, there is always going to be equal support and challenge. If you can challenge yourself to listen to your heart and get into action on its desires, you will be supported by living a great life!

If you’re looking for all support and to stay inside your comfort zone, or you’re just waiting for somebody or something outside of you to make it happen, then you will be challenged by the Universe.

Call me a control freak, but I’d rather challenge myself to live from my heart and be supported by the Universe than sit around and wait for a challenge.

And in my experience, doing your inner work and challenging yourself is the most fulfilling, inspiring place to live.

For the full podcast, be sure to check it out here.

How to have a more intimate relationship



In pursuit of unleashing your greatness and living the life that you know you’re capable of, it can sometimes feel like you don’t always have the intimate relationship you would love with your partner.

This is important because relationships often are one of your highest values. And when you have a healthy, loving relationship that will impact other areas of your life.

When you feel like you have a close, healthy, loving, intimate relationship, you often feel more connected, supported and like you are on top of the world.

On the other hand, when intimacy has been put on the back burner because of lack of time, energy, or life in general, life can sometimes feel lonely. Typical internal dialogue may also include second-guessing yourself or your relationship, feelings of ‘shoulds’ or ‘ought to’s’ and sometimes even guilt. This may lead to feeling needy, insecure or fearful, all of which are emotions that take you out of your heart.

One of the critical reasons for lack of intimacy in consciously loving relationships, especially if you have young children or a new career/business, is that it can consume you.

Let’s use business as an example, as it’s a common one for many high-performers.

Picture two circles, one of which represents you, and the other one represents your new business.

What often happens, especially in the first few years of starting a new business, is that you pour all your time and energy into what you are doing. You take little time for yourself and become consumed with what you do.

When you do this, the two separate circles actually become one, and you can lose yourself in your business. If you have young kids, you’ll likely see the same thing happen there.

Once you become engulfed with your career, business, kids, etc. what happens is when your partner comes into the picture, it can feel ‘unsafe’ on a subconscious level for you to be intimate because you don’t want to lose yourself completely.

And just know most of this is happening on a subconscious level, so you likely won’t know that the reason you aren’t feeling inspired to be intimate or you feel too tired, not enough time etc. is likely because of a fear that you don’t want to lose yourself.

One of the best things that you can do to shift this to have a more intimate relationship is to create more space and time for yourself, especially in the area of life where you are being ‘consumed’ or, in other words, giving all of yourself.

If you are spending all your time on work, it’s essential to take time away from it and do something for yourself. Likewise, if you are giving all your time and energy to your kids, it is vital for your relationship that you take time away from your kids (even if it’s for a short time).

When you do this instead of the two circles overlapping, they intersect slightly and allow for a more balanced, loving relationship. This will enable you to feel safe and be more open to being more intimate.

Step one in becoming more intimate is to take time for yourself. Write it down, carve out time, and start taking action on it.  If you’re getting stuck and find that you aren’t doing it, you may have a limiting belief holding you back.

A common theme I often see is feeling guilty for taking time for yourself, or the need to be hustling, to survive and thrive.

Just know that taking time for yourself is one of the most loving things you can do for yourself and your relationship.

If you’re looking for more tips and advice on consciously loving relationships, check out my website at www.andreaparkercoaching.com/events.

I would love to support you wherever you are in your journey to take your life, love, and happiness to the next level.

Try these 4-simple steps the next time your partner is frustrating you

Andrea Parker teaching with Yin and Yang



One of the questions I often get asked is, “how do I navigate it when my partner, who I love, and want the best for, is irritating me?”

Relationship challenges are consistently one of the top three challenges high-performers come to me with for help. 

The truth is if you do not feel fulfilled in your relationship(s), it can have a significant impact on other areas of your life, including your inner happiness.

Odds are you have experienced this for yourself. 

Think back to when you and your partner (or if you are not currently with someone, insert somebody who you love), weren’t on the same page or when they were irritating you. 

This feeling of frustration can become distracting and take you out of your heart and away from showing up how you want to in the relationship.

So what do you do when this happens? 

Whether it’s your partner, spouse, co-worker, family member, etc., one of the number one tools that I would recommend using the next time you feel frustrated with someone is The Extreme Freedom Process©, created by Lise Janelle.  

Here’s how it works:

I recommend writing down the following questions and your answers as you go through this process. This isn’t something that you will be sharing with someone else (unless you choose to), so I invite you to be as honest as you can with yourself for each question.

The Extreme Freedom Exercise:

Step 1: Ask yourself, what is their problem, and why is this frustrating you?

For instance, perhaps your partner is frustrating because they aren’t communicating with you. 

You can even dig a little further and ask what about them not communicating with me is bugging me?

Step 2: What is the advice you would give them? 

If only they would listen to you in an ideal world, “all” would be solved. What’s your advice to them?

For example, what advice would you give them about not communicating?

Step 3: Where in your life are you doing the same as they are in question one?

For example, ask yourself where in your life, are you not communicating?

The key is to humble yourself. 

It may not be in the exact same way, but just know that you, too, are doing the same thing. Keep searching until you discover what it is. 

Think of all the eight areas of your life (career, finances, social, spiritual, family, environment, physical, mental).

Perhaps you aren’t communicating with yourself?

Step 4: Based on the advice you gave them, what’s the advice you would give yourself?

The key is for you to get into action on the advice you would give yourself because the real reason your partner (or the other person) is irritating you is that you aren’t doing what you’re supposed to be doing. 

You have a block or resistance around it, that is creating an emotional charge. 

By YOU taking action and working on your number four (the advice you would give yourself), that’s when the magic happens, and most likely, one of two things will occur.

Either by you doing your inner work here and getting into action, you will naturally shift the other person, and they’ll stop doing whatever was bugging you, or they’ll continue to do it, but it will not upset you anymore because the charge is gone.

It’s essential to pay attention to your answer to #4 because that’s a clue to where you have a block or limiting belief holding you back. 

When I am working with my clients, I have them complete this exercise and send me their answer to number four so that I can help them dissolve the block around it so that it’s no longer pushing their buttons, and they’re able to move forward with their action steps more effortlessly.

Just know that you will be both supported and challenged in your relationship.  By understanding this, it will help you to have more appreciation for yourself and your partner:) 

If you are interested in learning more about Love and Relationships, I invite you to visit my website and check-out my upcoming Love Mastery Workshop.  Click here for more information.