How committed are you to giving yourself the life that you’d love?
One of the common things I see among driven, fun and inspiring souls is a fear of disappointing themselves or letting themselves down by failing.
Here’s an example of a recent conversation I had with an incredible human.
She shared her dreams, goals, and aspirations with me for the next 12 months, with a theme of working less, earning more while having more fun.
This dream is something that she deeply wanted.
Here’s the problem. When I asked her how committed she was to giving herself this life, she hesitated.
She had resistance saying she was a 10/10 committed because if she were a ten and then didn’t hit all her goals, she would be disappointed in herself.
What if she tried and it didn’t work out. Or if she failed. Then what.
These are all very common stories and fears.
I asked her this, 12 months from now if you don’t take steps to give yourself the things your heart wants, then you’ll never see your loved ones again. If that were the case on a scale from 1-10, how committed would you be to making it happen?
She said I am a 10. I would do whatever it takes for me to do that.
I love asking it this way, because often when it’s for someone else, we are more willing to do what it takes, no matter what. But when it comes down to doing it for ourselves, we hesitate.
A common subconscious belief that pops up when admitting your dreams is that it is not safe to pursue your goals.
A big one I often see in my clients is when they were younger, they asked for what they wanted and when they didn’t get it, it hurt too much, so they decided to stop asking.
For this woman, she felt like she ‘failed’ herself in the past and didn’t want to do that again.
Like many driven people, she pursued a career and society’s version of outer success, and because of that, she worked her butt off. This had a negative impact on her health, relationships and joy.
So now that she was going to move her dream forward, she had inner resistance because it subconsciously doesn’t feel safe. She was scared that she would be burnt out by pursuing her dream, and she would have no time for what she loves.
Here’s the truth: when you pursue your heart’s desires, it often pulls you out of your comfort zone. When that happens, it is going to be normal to experience fear.
It’s the subconscious fear that creeps in, and that’s rooted in feeling unworthy, not enough, unloveable, or incapable, that keeps you stuck.
The good news is those are just stories.
They are not the truth.
You can rewire them.
For this woman, these fears helped her climb the corporate ladder and create outer success.
She is now ready to do it from Stage Two of Human Development, where success comes from within, and she’s doing it from the values of her heart.
When you’re playing this game, yes, fear will still pop up, but you don’t have to be creating from that ‘have-to’s place of pushing, overachieving and killing yourself doing it.
Instead, Stage Two living is all about leading from ‘love-tos’ and inspiration.
You have to be willing to challenge yourself and be ready to not give up on your dreams. It takes courage to admit what you want.
One place that you can start is having a big enough why.
Why is it essential that you do this?
Why is it essential that you live the life that you love?
For this person, it is important because she wants to live a life worth living. It would impact her family, her friends, all these other things. But really, she wants to live an extraordinary life.
So for you, what is your why? Allow that to pull you up. And also, know that yes, the fear of the resistance will likely be there.
Go ahead and permit yourself to be a 10/10 committed. Following your heart is the safest thing you can do!
If you’re committed to taking the next steps in your journey, I’d love to invite you to a FREE So In Love With Your Life Session.